i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
