im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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