i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Randomize
