i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
My ass is underappreciated
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
