Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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