well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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