So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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