Whod you bang
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
