I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You need Xanax blowdarts
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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