Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
My brain says no but my pants say off.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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