That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize