I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I have demons in me.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
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Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize