i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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