Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Randomize