Plan B is the new Plan A
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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