You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Found your dick twin last night
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
True college students do jello shots in the library
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
