when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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