It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
