This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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