im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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