Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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