the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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