remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
