so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Randomize
