areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
