i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
