I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
