Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize