I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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