I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
this will be a night to untag.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
