she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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