Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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