They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
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I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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