The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
tell me about the eggs
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize
