I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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