sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
