We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
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If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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