So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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