my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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