Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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