He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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