my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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