i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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