Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

You can't special order awesome

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(207): View more from Maine

I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it

(617): View more from Massachusetts

We call that spaghetti Os

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(912): View more from Georgia

Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.

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(509): View more from Washington

I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(314): View more from Missouri

Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad

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(516): View more from New York

my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now

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(818): View more from California

I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing

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(513): View more from Ohio

Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?

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