I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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