i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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