Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
