dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
lying in bed pretending to be a slug