I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I can't turn off my feet"
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
