return my video game
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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