I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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